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a rant about my "writing"--esp TU ___2003-08-20 - 12:30 a.m.

*blah*

I want to write. It's simple as that. I want to write stories that make a difference in someone's life.

God, I must be dreaming.

It's not like I write anything oRIGinal; I only write FANfiction. What a fucking cop-out. Just an excuse for a lack of creativity, really.

But for now... it's good enough for me.

I just want to sit down and write something to make ME proud-- something worthy to be read. Hell, an influx of review notifications and emails wouldn't be so bad, either. I still get one once in a while-- God knows HOW people can find my long unupdated fics. And to those that have, I thank you. It's because of you that I still WANT to write.

Still, I can't pick up the pen as often as I would like to. Granted, I went to the laundromat last week and wrote in my notebook as the clothing spun round, but it just doesn't feel like enough.

My "World Gone Mad/Mixing Reality and Fiction"(can't remember the new title at the moment) POV Inuyasha story is hard on me. Heh. Maybe it's the ultra-dark subject matter. And it would explain why I won't even LOOK at it at night-- lest those nightmares that inspired some of it should return and wake me.

I wanted to enter it into Terror Unknown's fanfiction contest this year. And in most of the categories this year. Still might. But I've only got until August 31st. Time's a runnin' out.... I'm still shocked that "Kitsunetsuki: Shuurajou" placed 3rd in the Angst category of the contest last year. Wouldn't it be AWEsome if I could WIN this year!?!?

Hn.

I'm dreaming. Always dreaming.

Well, thanks for reading if you made it this far. Most of the rant is out of me now.

~Duo no Tsuin